How To Make Integrated Decisions?

How often have you wrestled with a decision? In fact, you can feel how torn you feel. It consumes your thoughts, perhaps you have even found yourself mumbling incessantly about what you are trying to figure out. Before we try to find a way to get to a decision, let’s start by understanding what is actually going on.

Integrated Coaching is about bringing together three very different but important parts of us … any guesses as to what they are? 🙂 They are your head where your thoughts reside (cognitive space), your heart where you access your feelings (emotional space) and your body where you are able to experience what you think and feel through sensations (somatic space).

Why is this important, well because if you step back and see these three parts as separate you will start to see that they have different needs and this is typically evident when we struggle to make a decision. It’s because the heart wants this and the head wants that and the body perhaps somewhere in between or chooses a side 🙂

Now let’s take this knowledge back to you as you wrestle with your decision. Imagine that each of these parts all had voices – they will all be talking at the same time, perhaps even shouting – now you can see why it’s difficult to get to an answer.

Here’s a quick technique that you can try to help unpack the different voices that will help you with getting to a decision.

1. Let’s start with the cognitive space. Write down the thoughts you have on this decision, things like what is it that you want to do, what is the possible risks and advantages, what will make the decision difficult to reach. Which decision makes the most sense to you?

2. Moving to the emotional space. How are you feeling about this decision? How do you feel about the choices you have? Which decision makes you feel the calmest and sincere?

3. Moving to the somatic (body) space. When you think about the decision what do you notice happening in your body in terms of sensations – it could be tension, heat, movement etc. When you think about the different choices – what do you notice happening in the body. Notice which decision feels right in your body – it could feel peaceful, energetic etc.

4. If you reflect on all three spaces did you notice different decisions worked best in each space? Reflect on this and what you have learned about what each space needing. Integrate this into your decision.